It’s been awhile, I know. Hope to do better but sometimes life happens.
I was relieved to see that I hadn’t missed the date. I still remember everything about that day. I had just finished group on Ramp classes two days before. I knew right away that I wanted to start group classes when I was finished. I was so nervous to start classes. I knew how hard the workouts were during my on ramp I could only imagine how hard the workouts were going to be in a class setting. But I walked in and was ready to work. I was there for make up day so I let my coach guide me into doing a workout she thought would allow me to feel accomplished when I finished. I remember thinking that it wasn’t going to be too bad…..I was wrong. She modified the rep scheme for me so that I got the intended stimulus, but it still sucked. The workout? “Annie” 50-40-30-20-10 Double unders and Abmat situps. Luckily I didn’t have to do the workout all by myself. Whenever I do “Annie” now, I always think about Marcy and how incredibly nice and encouraging she was while we did that workout together. I’ve done the workout many times since and have gone from highly modifying it like on that first day to now doing the workout as written. This system of measurable data is what helps to keep things in perspective for me when I don’t feel like I’m progressing like I should. I have to continually remind myself where I started.
I’m not the best athlete and I was so incredibly out of shape that everything we did was uncomfortable. I was last all the time and I didn’t have clothes that fit. I didn’t move fast and I couldn’t do simple movements. BUT I WANTED TO BE SUCCESSFUL. I knew right away that I wanted my coaches to be proud of me. I wanted them to know that I could do anything if they gave me the chance to show them. And they did, over and over again. They believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. They stood right next to me and encouraged me to do one more rep. They looked me in the eye and told me it was ok when I was tearful from trying over and over and not being successful. They reminded me that I needed to be proud of what my body could DO instead of focusing on the numbers on the scale.
Fast forward THREE YEARS!!!!!
Now I’m still not the best athlete, I still come in last sometimes, things are still uncomfortable BUT I am such a different person than I was back then. Those coaches that I wanted to make proud gave me the best opportunity I could ever ask for: to believe in those that don’t believe in themselves yet. When I walked into West End CrossFit three years ago I NEVER even imagined the direction my life would take. I was looking for a way to get in shape, be healthy and have fun while doing it. If you had told me that day I did “Annie” for the first time, that three years later I would be coaching others, I would have laughed at you. Some days I still don’t believe it, don’t feel worthy of what I’ve been given. I think back to that girl who had no confidence in herself and want to tell her, “Guess what? in three years you’re going to be strong. You’re going to be proud of yourself. You’re going to make a difference. Keep moving forward because you’re going to get better every day.”
So on this awesome day filled with lots of PR’s(we maxed out front squats today. I increased 40 pounds since November from 240# to 280# even after having wrist surgery in July which ended in a plate and 8 screws in my left radius) I am so thankful for so many things. Tim and Jen, thank you for believing in me and seeing the potential that I never knew was there. Thank you for entrusting your athletes with me, I feel very lucky to do what I do everyday. Thank you for everyone that told me “you got this!” because at some point I believed you and that helped me to not give up. And of course, Bobby. Thanks for allowing me to follow this passion that I never knew I had. I’m so lucky to have you, even if your cookie obsession drives me crazy.